I’ve had something very heavy weighing on my heart. It’s a total joy crusher and has the tendency to creep in and out of my life, always showing up when I’m feeling super busy, stressed, or tired. Ladies and gents, I’ve had a case of mom guilt lately.
I’m not even going to pretend I’m alone on this one, because I know many moms who experience the same feeling. As horrible as it is, I’m so glad we’re in this together.
Working part-time, developing content for Marina Makes three days a week and carving out time to spend with my husband and daughter has caused mom guilt and stress to wiggle its way into my life. I’ve had a lot of late nights and early mornings – it’s been one of the busiest seasons of my life, and about a month or two ago, it was getting pretty bad. I started questioning whether or not it was the right thing to start a blog while working. I was getting down if I needed my husband to put what he was doing on hold to keep our daughter occupied while I spent time cooking. And worse of all, I started to think I wasn’t being a good mom because I started devoting more time to my hobbies and interests. Point blank, I was getting frustrated because I couldn’t have it all.
But no mom can have it all. While I’ve always known that, I was still trying my best to have it, and my attempt was causing me to feel a lot of guilt.
The thing I dislike most about mom guilt is the pull it causes between what moms “selfishly” want, and what moms think their child wants/needs. Luckily, we have things like balance and peace of mind that can help eliminate this feeling I want to bury way deep down in the ground.
These past couple of weeks I’ve tried my best to adopt the mindset that I simply can’t have it all. There will be some weeks that I can’t write three blog posts and have to settle with two, or there may be a day that my daughter or husband will not have 100% of my attention. It was a struggle at first, but lately I’ve been more content with this busy season, focusing on God’s plan for my family. I’ve made an effort to tell myself I’m still a good mom even if I can’t sit and play with my daughter all of the time, and it’s okay that I can’t climb up the corporate ladder as fast because I value the flexibility of my part-time schedule.
If we take a step back and recognize it’s just not possible to be perfect, and that our priorities will fluctuate from time to time, we can relieve some of our stress and pressure.
I’d love to hear your experiences with mom guilt and how you work through it all. It’s so important that we believe in ourselves as moms and encourage one another, because we all need reassurance every once in a while. I hope you all continue to make time for yourselves and for you family, finding a healthy balance between the two.